PICNIC

I was disappointed because the picnic was cancelled.My bag was to hevy and Idedent laice it.

DAWN PARADE

In the pitch black before dawn broke at the Auckland museum  thousands of people came together for the dawn parade. Crowds gathered as the sun rose in the morning. With respect every one stood silently as a man played The Last Post on the bugle. At the end every one went home to the sound of bagpipes.

ANZAC

World War 1 Movies

In turkey

What happened there was a war.

ANZAC Movies

    

In the story, think about what the little girl means when she says, “He marches for all his friends who cannot march.  He marches for us.”?

It means he marches for the people who died in the war.

waka storm/hokule'a

MOTAT

Yesterday the year 4's went to Motat on old school bus,to learn about exciting inventions. Eventually I got a chance to explore the mirror maze. When I strolled through the pump house I got a piece of black coal. In the village prison cell there was a very very very freaky man, he looked dead and he was staring at me. The earthquake cafe.

Criteria for an Effective Paragraph	Par 1	Par 2	Par 3	Par 4	Par 5
⚈ Start with a topic sentence.	yes
⚈ Have at least 2-3 connected sentences.	no
⚈ Have sentences that are effective that have varied beginnings	yes
b.  have juicy vocab e.g action/describing  words	yes
(c) grammatically correct	yes
(d) punctuated correctly.	yes
(Think of 1 or 2 things that you need to to focus on next time, to make sure your paragraphs are effective.)
Next time I  need to ….

All about me

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